“Mommy what is this… vote for Question 6?” my youngest says to me on our way out of the door to school. “Um, it’s a yard sign. Come on we are running late. Get your book bag.” “But what does it mean? What is Question 6?” he asks with urgency. I pause. It seems like every important conversation happens when we are rushing out the door or driving and I can’t focus. This time I stop in my tracks because I realize in this moment that school can wait; this is an important conversation for our family. It deserves my full attention. “You know how when you take a test, there are a bunch of …
A moment that I had thought about, prepared for, dreaded, and denied for the better part of 20 years arrived this weekend when Barbie crossed our threshold in her 1/4” stilettos clutched by my 3-year-old daughter’s hands. We have a "marble jar" system in our house to remind me and my husband to use positive reinforcement whenever possible. The kids get a marble every time they do something we’d like to see continue (e.g., share, get dressed, not kill each other), and when the jar is full, they are entitled to something of their choosing. After months of working toward their goal, they …
When our toddler learned the word "no" (which they tend to do fast) I tried to find ways to get her to do the things that we still needed her to do, like brushing teeth, taking baths and eating the occasional vegetable.I asked other friends what their methods were and most of them centered around some kind of responsibility chart or reward system. When I first embarked on this idea a few months ago, I felt a "true" responsibilities chart (like the kind you buy in a store with chores and magnets that correspond to the chore) might have been a little over her head. One friend who had such a …
Many people make lists of things they will change or let go of in the New Year, resolutions as they are aptly called. I like to take a moment of reflection in the beginning of the New Year with my family — a time to reflect on the year as a whole, think of the exciting places we've been, the experiences we've had, the great movies we've seen. This year I stumbled across this wonderful blog, Run Lucas Run, in which the author created exactly what I was looking for: a list of questions that captures who my children are right now. My plan is to do this each year, seal them in an envelope and …
Recently, Petula Dvorak of The Washington Post wrote two columns addressing the busy lives of parents. The author compared a mom’s work to Santa’s, with the exception that while Santa takes it easy on Dec. 26, a mom’s work continues 365 days a year. What resonated with me most from her articles was how mothers today keep very odd hours, often with little sleep. She described sending e-mails related to PTA matters in the wee hours of the morning, only to get immediate responses from other mothers who were also online. (Been there, done that.) As she talked about gardening at 1 a.m., I thought…
The day is approaching that almost every child has been looking forward to for months — Christmas morning. My children are no different; they have been making their wish lists since their birthdays passed. I, on the other hand, am having a hard time getting in the celebratory mood. My children’s father and I are divorced, and we share custody on a weekly basis. It actually works out great — We update each other through emails about the boys. We coordinate a Google calendar to remind each other of special days or extra curricular activities. And each year we take turns for the holidays. I had …
With the holidays upon us, I have found that my children are receiving gifts everywhere we turn. Go to my sister’s wedding: gift. Lunch with cousins we don’t get to see very often: gift. Seeing the grandparents: gift (and we hadn’t even gotten to December yet). We are blessed by generous relatives and friends who want to take part in the joy my children display when receiving a new toy or stuffed animal or puzzle. We also have the means to attend holiday events laden with candy canes, goody bags, and gift-wrapped surprises. I really don’t want to sound ungrateful — and I mean this in the …
As the holidays approach, many parents are planning to travel with their kids. While the idea of visiting family and friends sounds great, it's usually when they anticipate the traveling that parents start to question their sanity— for good reason, too. I recently flew to Boston from Baltimore with both kids and husband in tow. In many ways, these were ideal flying conditions as it was a short flight, minimal luggage was required, and my husband and I were together so we were able to take the “man-on-man” defensive approach with the kids. The kids had their own backpacks stuffed with …
My children are now old enough that I can leave them in the bathtub while I go downstairs to check my email, without fear of them drowning. I no longer need to cut their food in bite-size pieces for fear of them choking. We’ve moved into a new stage of their development that I am calling “playground independence.” We bought our house in this neighborhood because of the playgrounds and because there are so many families with children. From my front door, we can see one of those playgrounds, and within seconds of hearing laughter from that direction my sons will put on their shoes in lightening…
We recently embarked on a long trip with our daughter to the tune of an eight-hour drive. I know there are many families who have done much longer than that. But at the end of our summer, a regular five-hour drive was not the happy jaunt it used to be. Our daughter was very restless and bored despite the books, toys and other fun things I had packed for the trip. It’s not easy for anyone sitting in a car for long periods of time. Toddlers are no different but they don’t always understand that there is an end to the journey. I always try to seek out fun places to stop along the way, like …
What do you get when you clothe your son in a gray sweatsuit, affix thin strips of yellow and white electrical tape in lines down the middle and sides of his body, and Velcro Matchbox cars along the spaces in between? Why, Greenbelt Road, of course! How about when you put your toddler in his yellow raincoat, a borrowed pair of yellow rain pants, and his rain boots, tie some plastic fish on a rope to the end of a stick and let him carry the stick out in front of him? The most adorable fisherman ever to grace the seven seas. And finally, using a black thermal shirt and pants, some colorful …
The march of celebrations is upon us, and with it, lots of excitement around food. Of course, as with many things in our American society, anything that is exciting and fun is also riddled with anxiety. From Halloween through New Year’s, it can seem like one long food binge of tasty treats and accompanying guilt. Add kids to this mix and you’re in for quite the conundrum. Halloween was a main concern when my son was diagnosed with food allergies. The thought of him missing out on all the fun because he was limited to boxes of raisins was almost too much to bear. The day-to-day food needs …
There are many moments that I hope my children will recall as fond memories from childhood when they are adults — moments they don’t appreciate now, but might later say, "If it wasn't for my mom..." We are working on responsibilities in our house. Each member of the family has responsibilities in our household — including the children. I'm purposely not calling these "chores.” I'm not looking at this solely as an opportunity to have someone help me scrub the toilet or feed the dog, but hope to eliminate whining about homework and begging for a toy every time we walk into Target. Each week …
I realize that kids will make noise in restaurants. And on those occasions, most people know which ones truly are kid friendly and which ones aren’t. For the most part, we haven’t feared eating in public with our toddler. She generally does pretty well, usually squealing with delight and avoiding her food, as she’s too busy observing all the activity around her. But recently, we crossed a threshold I hoped we never would—the “there’s absolutely nothing you can do to keep your toddler from screaming and squirming the entire time she is in the restaurant” phase. We recently met some family …
